1st Scenario: I’m with a group of college students having casual conversations- school, clothing, parties, French fries, name it- and I am that chatty and loud person, giggling to almost everything like a little school girl. And they adore me.
2nd Scenario: I’m with a group of people of my age (probably I’m the youngest) and we talk about something more serious- life, Christianity, health, politics (Ugh! I read the paper but I am not a fan of meditating on what’s happening in the country.) Still, I’d like to believe I give relevant insights on these conversations. I may sometimes be lazy, but I’m not dumb to have my opinion on the profundity of things.
So all of these leave me wondering what I’m really like in front of people? Am I the serious type who can deal with talking about life’s complexities or am I the one who laughs crazily over the most insignificant detail one can ever talk about?
I get the respect of different people on different age brackets, from 40 somethings down to 3 year-olds, when I’m really in the intellectual zone. I get all big-sisterly over the college kids and they seem to learn from me. But then again I also do behave in a way that I can relate to them that makes me feel so childish I wonder the other generation would be surprised upon learning how silly I can also get.
I haven’t really been all chatty with the grown ups because I feel compelled to act more maturely. And I ought to. I am 25! They certainly have fun in a different way than the young ones. I do enjoy both, but I’m hesitant to be giggly or to jump in excitement in front them. I’m supposed to be respectable!
Now I wonder, am I authentic or fraud? Am I a grown up or pretending to be?
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OMG! I'm on the same boat as you. I'll be turning 25 this year too. So anyhow, I can definitely relate. After reading your post I couldn't help but think of Britney's I'm Not A Girl, Not Yet A Woman...Wherein we are somewhere in between. Well, the way I see it, we are chameleon's, or we are a rainbow. There are many sides of us that help us deal with different people from different age brackets and different walks of life. At the end of the day, what matters most is the experience we had with these other people, what we learned, and what we taught others, and how much fun we had. =)
ReplyDeleteThanks mel...you're right. Maybe I'm overly criticizing myself again and overthinking! =) How I hate it when i'm expected to behave in a certain way (in a 25-ish way) haha. But i feel better realizing that i'm not alone with this =)
ReplyDeleteI think it's good to be able to adapt to your surroundings. It doesn't mean you're fake... just that you know how to make the best out of any situation!
ReplyDeleteWe all act differently around various types of people...when I answer the phone, my voice changes. You're not a fraud at all, you see what the situation is, how people are responding to it and then act the best way. You can be both serious and fun...there's no exact mold that we all fit into. :D
ReplyDelete@ ambles - thanks! that's the good perspective for it, being able to adapt. =)
ReplyDelete@ larissa - my voice changes in the phone too! in the office and at home lol. have to sound more professional in the office right? thanks so much!